6:27 p.m. - 09.25.2003
The Heat Is On
The Pop-tart "toast or not" feedback was great. It was pretty tied up, but I think a few more people ended up liking the non-toasted in the end. As it should be. Don't get me wrong - I'm cool with you toasters as well....(heathens).
Rite153 said that there seems to be more flavor when they're toasted - but that reminded me that I actually thought the opposite. When they're piping hot it never seems to me to taste quite as jammy.
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One thing I think the world can agree on is the pull-your-hair-out annoyance of that little Microsoft paper-clip office assistant. What the f@#&?! Dude! I know how to use Word - so step off bitch!
Okay, seriously though, it is annoying. The sad part is - he's only trying to help. He lives to help. Is that so wrong?
His name is Clippit. What I want is for someone who knows Flash to create a little cartoon where clippit get's smoked. I wanna see him go like Christopher Lloyd at the end of Who Framed Roger Rabbit. I wanna see the eyes bulge outta his head as his body slowly gets crushed under a steamroller, and all he can do is wriggle and scream with lots more eye bulging, and his tongue shaking violently outta control like Homer Simpson�s when he has any prolonged scream. The end effect would look a lot like Large Marge's face in Pee Wee's Big Adventure (It was on a night, just like tonight! Worst accident I ever seen...)
I know you can shut Clippit off, or you can change him to something else, depending upon which version of Windows you run.
I'm assuming you all run Windows, because I'm assuming y'all are cool. *winkwink*
(I love how the Mac v Windows debate is to the geek world what Ford v Chevy is to the redneck world. Heated, and at times down right ugly.)
***
I have all kinds of fantastically boring work stories I could share with you - but instead, I'll share tips of what to do at work when you're fantastically bored.
Basically, it's all about passing time.
And if you work in a very large company like mine, I found a great way to pass the time. I'd say the internet - but when you work at a fascist company like mine that prohibits non-essential internet access - you're forced to get creative, because there's only so much to do to occupy yourself on Windows.
Of course, all computers have a C, A, D, and maybe E drive. But if you work at a monster company, their may be drives from F until Z++. So to kill a little time, why not but your hiking boots on and go hard drive explorin'?
The most fun is to do a simple file/folder search through all the shared hard-drives for jpegs. Nameless, faceless people who work on another floor on another end of the building from you are always sure to keep completely embarrassing photos on the computer unaware that you have access to them. These are photos they put on their computer at work to email and share with their private friends, or ones sent to them by others.
After you look at all those, the biggest waste of time is to start playing with the network trees.
You know in windows explorer, where it lists all the drives and folders? And next to them there is a plus or minus sign? If you click on a plus, it opens the folder to reveal more folders with more plus signs. Well open the plus signs. All of 'em. Every damn one on every damn drive, until you have a giant network tree. If you work at a company as big as mine it'll take hours. Actually, if you work at a company as big as mine - you'll never even finish. I have yet to open them all.
Another option is to simply create a new folder. And in that create a new folder, and then another, then another...it's a lot like those mirrors where you see your reflection and it seems to go on forever. As a kid, you try to look around yourself, so you can see what's behind you that goes on forever, but it never really works.
If this is boring you, how do you think I feel. This is what I get paid to do.
It could be worse. A friend of mine in another cubicle is bored enough that he has taken to using clip art instead of his name. Kinda like when Prince went to that symbol. One day he sent an email out saying that, "from now on my name is (and there was just a clip art of a lion head)."
So now at work I get emails something like this, "Hey guys, it's (lion's head). I just wanted to let you know the 4-5-4 Allocations and Zero Cost reports are finished. Thanks, (lion's head).
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