1:01 p.m. - 12.18.2002
Cracklin' Nose and the WTO
I've been sick the last few days but I'm getting over it now.
As I was walking to lunch, my left nostril started to clear-up by making a crackling sensation. I'm relieved to be clearing up, but the spontanteous and intermittent crackling sucks. I'd rather have the fluttering under-the-eye muscle spasm any day.
As my crackling nose and I were walking, I couldn't help but sing to myself Neil Diamond's classic "Cracklin' Rose" with the words rearranged to "Cracklin' Nose". A bouncey little tune that.
I'm pretty good at making up new lyrics to songs. I have a great version of Dave Matthews' "Ant's Marching" that I have rearranged so that its now about a Jewish bris. Cutting edge stuff.
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In my last entry about my farwell party I forgot to tell you about my card. It was one of those "from everyone" cards where they pass it around all secret-like and write words of encouragment on my impending unemployment.
On the front was a cartoon of office workers standing around a coffee machine. The catch is that the workers were animals. Animals that would never have the opportunity geographically to gather around the coffee-maker so freely. There was a giraffe, a duck, a goat, and a porcupine. They all had shirts on but not bottoms, a la the Shirt Tales or Donald Duck. The outside read, "Leave if you must, but remember one thing.... (inside)We only make fun of people who aren't here to defend themselves." .... I knew it. They hate me. And it doesn't even rhyme. Didn't the set-up psych you up for a rhyme?
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I was killing time during lunch at the News stand by flipping through UTNE. It had an article about a group of prankster/imposters who run an anti-WTO website. Their site is said to look just like the real WTO site, so people email them asking for WTO members to give lectures at various events. And they happily agree. They show up to these conferences under the guise of being with the WTO, and give these speeches the leave the audience dumbfounded - but still believeing its the WTO. They tell people the WTO is disbanding due to its failure in the Third World. They show up at lectures in suits, but then strip down to gold jumpsuites with giant phalluses and proceed to give lectures. And people patiently sit and listen. It's really quite a hoot, I do it no justice. the fake site is gatt.org and the site for the individuals pulling this stunt off, the Yes Men, is theyesmen.org. Check 'em out.
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